I am a huge fan of comforters for babies and all the way through toddlerhood and beyond.

A comforter is a soft toy, small blanket or piece of material that your child can reach for in the middle of the night or when they are faced with a new situation (like first day at nursery) that will provide them with, you guessed it, comfort. They can also be known as a lovey, comfort item or transitional object.

This is all down to something called attachment. It is natural for a child to form a strong attachment to their primary caregivers when they’re young. This all happens from birth through the love you give, physical affection and responding to their needs.

However as your baby grows they will be faced with times when you cannot be not there. Perhaps you have to go back to work and so they will be going to nursery or to stay with grandma for the day. Children can transition through these periods of change quite smoothly if given the tools to do so.

One of those tools can be the introduction of a comfort item. Over time your child can form healthy attachment to their soft toy or blanket, helping them deal with any separation anxiety they may experience when you aren’t around.

Many nurseries are used to children coming in with their comforters and take good care of them.

Once introduced successfully a comforter can also be used by your child to soothe themselves to sleep and through any night wakings. It is a positive sleep association as it is completely controlled by your child and one which they will slowly reduce their dependance on naturally over time.

Learn more about how to teach your baby to sleep through the night ↓

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Are comforters safe for babies?

Comforters are safe for babies as long as you choose an appropriate item and follow safe sleep guidelines.

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Younger babies are more likely to self settle with a dummy or pacifier, and older babies are more likely to use a comfort object like a soft toy or blanket.

I recommend introducing a comforter during supervised awake time to your child when they are between 4-6 months. However, when it comes to using the comforter for sleep please read below:

In the UK it is recommended that your baby does not sleep with anything in their cot other than their sleeping bag and a fitted sheet until after 12 months. (Lullaby Trust)
In Australia the recommendation to leave a comfort item in your child’s cot is from 7 months onwards. (Red Nose Foundation Australia)

Safe sleep practices vary across the globe. It is important that you are informed so you can make a decision based on what you are comfortable with.

However you MUST choose an item that is safe. There can be no chance of your child suffocating, getting any cords/ribbons/strings wrapped around them and the item must be free of buttons, eyes or other small items that could be swallowed.

How do you introduce one successfully?

I have had many parents ask me this question, many who have felt like they have tried with no success. Remember, introducing a comforter to your child is not a necessity, but it can help many children feel confident and safe in new situations or at bedtime. Success comes with consistency (like anything with babies and children!) and also the child’s natural need to form an attachment to something other than mum or dad.

Choose your comfort item! Make it something safe, easily washable and something you can get back ups of if one gets lost!
Have mum or dad sleep with the comforter for a few nights, this will make it smell familiar to your little one.
You will want to then introduce the comforter during every feed. Whether you’re breast-feeding or bottle feeding, have the comforter resting between you and your child. This is most integral for attachment to form.
Use the comforter for playtime and bedtime routine! Have the item around loads so your child gets really used to it.
You can also take the comfort item to new situations and have it there for your child to cuddle or hold even if they haven’t formed a full attachment yet.
You can give your child the comfort item for supervised sleep before 7-12 months.
Once you have decided it is safe for your child to sleep with their comforter overnight, you can give it to them in their cot and watch their attachment grow.

It is important not to try and force attachment to a comforter upon your child. They will respond naturally and create the attachment when they need it. For example if you are breastfeeding and bed-sharing it is common for your little one to not need a comfort item just yet. And that is completely fine.

Do I need to take my child’s comfort item away from them eventually?

No! You don’t ever have to wean your child from their comfort item. You may need to set boundaries and rules for when the comfort item can be present (like perhaps not at the dinner table). However I know of many adults who still have their comfort item from when they were younger and there is no negative impact on their social, emotional or intellectual abilities.

For many children, their reliance on their comforter slowly decreases with age. Studies examining children’s attachments to various classes of objects found that strong attachment to comfort items, peaks at 18 and 24 months, stays near this high level through 3.5 years, and diminishes steadily through 6 years.

Hopefully you have picked up some tips in this post, if you want more info on introducing a comforter, check out this episode of the Rest is Best podcast:

Does your little one sleep with a comfort item or dummy but is still waking more than 2-3 times overnight?

This is because babies and toddlers have the biological drive to sleep, but often we need to show them how. It may sounds strange but did you know babies aren’t born with the skill of being able to fall asleep independently?

When babies can’t fall asleep independently at bedtime, they will wake throughout the night looking for help to get back to sleep every couple of hours (or maybe more!).

This is where I come in..

I’ll help you lovingly and supportively show your baby how to do sleep on their own so you can have your evenings back, sleep through the night again and get your baby napping 1-3 hours at a time.